Thursday, February 9, 2012


The word 'blow' is now synonym with terrorism. A Muslim businessman in California was detained and questioned by authority for telling his sales personnel to 'blow away the competition'.

Pre 9-11 (the start of WoT i.e. War on terror) this phrase used to mean to sweep aside the competition so that you stand out to be the numero uno.
Post 9-11 when the macho Gringos realised that they are as much vulnerable as their next door Chicano neighbours or Afghan wedding parties, the mere mention of the word 'bomb' turns their knees to jelly. Bombs blow up so anything that blows is terrifying. So, blow is terrifying, terror, terrorism, terrorist = arrest, rendition, yellow jumpsuit, water-boarding, and you are lost forever.

So now and forever refrain from using the four-letter 'bl*w' word in your everyday mundane conversations. If you are in the salon tell them to hot-air dry your hair. If you tell them to bl*w-dry your hair, its off to Gitmo you go. If you are really, really excited about something never, never say its mind-bl*owing nor expl*sive. Awesome or cool would do just fine.

If you are reading aloud Moby Dick and the phrase 'Thar she bl*ws' comes up, change it to 'Thar she expels'. Playing the song 'Bl*wing in the Wind' is a no-no. Ask instead for 'Farting in The Wind'. And if you are into asking someone to give you a bl*w-job, ask him/her for a smooch-job instead.

Just substitute 'bl*w' with anything suitable if you know what's good for you. Especially is you are a Muslim.

No comments: